Many customs of the Greeks have been passed down through Turkey, thanks to the many years the Turks had a stronghold over the country.  Many tourists are surprised to learn that the komboloi, or worry beads that the Greeks use for relaxation, or the backgammon games many locals are seen playing at the cafes, are actually Turkish customs.  This is also true with some of the traditional Greek marriage customs, and without asking an educated Greek, it is difficult to discern which come from the ancient Greeks and which come from Turkish rule. Either way, the modern Greeks see them as their own.

Many of these traditional customs are no longer practiced in modern Greece, especially in metropolitan areas like the city of Athens, but various aspects of them are still around.  It may sound crazy to us now, but traditionally, parents who are looking for a husband for their daughter will sometimes hire a professional matchmaker.  The parents of the bride must offer the groom a dowry, and if he accepts the amount, a ring exchange ceremony called arravon seals the deal.  This is the traditional Greek engagement, but I can attest that the engaged Athenian couple I know did not arrange things like this.

While the arravon is a little outdated, there are many traditional ceremonial acts that modern Greeks will incorporate in their wedding. One of these is called stefana, or wedding crowns.  Dating back to ancient times, this is still very popular today.  These crowns are very important to the bride and groom and many are often custom made with jewels.  During the ceremony, the bride and groom each wear a crown that is connected by ribbon, symbolizing their everlasting bond.  The Orthodox priest will then bless the crowns and the couple.  When the stefana is removed, it is preserved as a family heirloom, the ribbons never being disconnected; some newlyweds even place the crowns on display in their home.

Another Greek wedding tradition involves a member of the wedding party, the best man.  He is called koumbaros and has a very special role in the union of the couple.  Most often the koumbaros is the groom’s godfather, a very important person in a Greek’s life, but there are also instances where a close male friend or relative will play the part.  The koumbaros traditionally places the stefana on the couple’s head, symbolically switching them back and forth three times. He is also responsible for leading the dance at the reception, and the koumbaros will often serve as godfather for the couple’s first child.

Traditionally, at many celebrations, especially weddings, the Greeks smash plates as a symbol of passion and forward thinking; forgetting about the past.  If this plate smashing is to take place, this is also often started by the koumbaros.  Today, the plate smashing tradition is not as common, and instead they throw flowers at the traditional Greek dancers.  I supposed it much safer, less noisy, and helps to decorate the reception hall.

Greek Wedding Crowns